Post by Misarashi Katanai on Dec 16, 2008 17:38:50 GMT -5
Well, a lot has happened in the past few days or so for me. A lot of scary, scary things have occurred. It just makes a person think... Think about what's really important.
This site is very important to me. Don't think that I'm abandoning you. I really love writing and I love everyone on here. Actually, there is not one person I've talked to here that I dislike in the least bit. Even if I say I hate you, for me, hate means love...Kind of. Depending. You all make me smile and provide a slight ray of sunshine...
Still, I have to try and focus more on schoolwork. And my family. And my own personal health...
If you really wish to know, I had a bit of a "mental breakdown" the other day and was sent to the Emergency Room for the first time ever. I was scared out of my mind. My therapist wanted to send me to a temporary psych ward for two weeks. Two weeks. That would have meant spending Christmas by myself in a psych ward. Then, there was also the threat of being taken away from my family. Forever. That scared me. It scared me a lot.
And to top things all off, I got an email from my horrible bastard of a father this morning, saying that my grandmother, whom I haven't seen in over three years, was dying...and I "aught to know."
Mary Virnelson died today...
And I haven't talked to her in so long...I feel so...guilty...I don't know. The feeling is hard to describe.
Yes. Kat has clinical depression. No. Kat's not going to commit suicide. That's stupid. I would never stoop so low as to kill myself over my problems. I find that to be illogical on all levels. I still have sense...I just can't function properly.
Anyway, now that I've e-ranted a bit there...sorry for wasting your time with this really long and stupid letter by the way...
I think I'm going to take some time off. Yes. Some time off. That's what I need. Some time. To think. To think about how my life has been going. To think of how lucky I am to still be with my family, spending the holidays with those I love...
I will still come on. I will keep active. I will try to keep up with my threads, though, my responses will become slightly later than they had been. Writing is a bit of an outlet for me, to put it fankly...
Well, that was pointless to state. Gomen for wasting your time with my rants. --; So, yeah. Point one-- I'm not gonna be on *as* often...But point two-- I love you all and am going to try to get over this as soon as I can.
With All My Love,
Kat-chan
This site is very important to me. Don't think that I'm abandoning you. I really love writing and I love everyone on here. Actually, there is not one person I've talked to here that I dislike in the least bit. Even if I say I hate you, for me, hate means love...Kind of. Depending. You all make me smile and provide a slight ray of sunshine...
Still, I have to try and focus more on schoolwork. And my family. And my own personal health...
If you really wish to know, I had a bit of a "mental breakdown" the other day and was sent to the Emergency Room for the first time ever. I was scared out of my mind. My therapist wanted to send me to a temporary psych ward for two weeks. Two weeks. That would have meant spending Christmas by myself in a psych ward. Then, there was also the threat of being taken away from my family. Forever. That scared me. It scared me a lot.
And to top things all off, I got an email from my horrible bastard of a father this morning, saying that my grandmother, whom I haven't seen in over three years, was dying...and I "aught to know."
Mary Virnelson died today...
And I haven't talked to her in so long...I feel so...guilty...I don't know. The feeling is hard to describe.
Yes. Kat has clinical depression. No. Kat's not going to commit suicide. That's stupid. I would never stoop so low as to kill myself over my problems. I find that to be illogical on all levels. I still have sense...I just can't function properly.
Anyway, now that I've e-ranted a bit there...
I think I'm going to take some time off. Yes. Some time off. That's what I need. Some time. To think. To think about how my life has been going. To think of how lucky I am to still be with my family, spending the holidays with those I love...
I will still come on. I will keep active. I will try to keep up with my threads, though, my responses will become slightly later than they had been. Writing is a bit of an outlet for me, to put it fankly...
Well, that was pointless to state. Gomen for wasting your time with my rants. --; So, yeah. Point one-- I'm not gonna be on *as* often...But point two-- I love you all and am going to try to get over this as soon as I can.
With All My Love,
Kat-chan
